I swear to drunk I'm not God, but seriously, stay in drugs, eat school, and don't do vegetables. #27

What are the 2 reasons the girl broke up with her boyfriend? Because he was a cheetah and because he was lion too much to her. #33

Why don't programmers like nature? It has too many bugs. #21

Did you know that Snoop Dogg's sister is a stripper? She wears nothing but a G-string baaaby!! #57

What do you call the security outside of a Samsung Store? A Guardians of the Galaxy #29

A donkey fell into a bowl of sugar, Now that's a sweet asss. #44

Streaming with my Saudi Oil money Kappa #30

MEG NAKED

What's God's favorite chord ? Gsus. #28